THE ETHICAL TRAINER: POWER, RESPONSIBILITY, AND INTENTION
Recently, I attended a gathering organised by a respected trainer, where she referred to herself as Ibu (Mother) and her alumni as “my children.” The terms Guru (Master) and Murid (Student) were also used to describe the relationship, with an emphasis on honouring the Guru. As I listened, I noticed
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THE ETHICAL TRAINER: POWER, RESPONSIBILITY, AND INTENTION
Recently, I attended a gathering organised by a respected trainer, where she referred to herself as Ibu (Mother) and her alumni as “my children.” The terms Guru (Master) and Murid (Student) were also used to describe the relationship, with an emphasis on honouring the Guru. As I listened, I noticed my own reactions. I began to wonder what meanings these labels might be creating. What kind of relationship do they invite? And how might participants begin to see themselves within that frame? It was a gentle reminder to me that the words we choose as trainers do more than describe a relationship — they shape it.
That experience led me to a deeper reflection: the moment we influence meaning in another person; we are already exercising power. Not power in a negative sense, but influence — the ability to shape how someone thinks, feels, and sees themselves. As trainers, we do this all the time. Through our words, our tone, our questions, and even our silence, we guide attention and install meaning. This raises an important question: what impact am I creating right now, intentionally or unintentionally?
