DISTINGUISHING CAUSE & BLAME

If there’s a place where confusion is king and the land is the Land of Misery, it is the confusion between identifying a cause and blaming someone. This is the confusion also between a person being responsible for something which we hold that person accountable verses blaming and accusing. The first describe a healthy relationship for healthy people, the second describes a sick and toxic mind-set that leads to destructive relating. And inside of that mix is another difference. That’s the difference between that which causes something and the symptoms that result.

To clear out these confusions, let’s start by defining what we’re referring to.

Cause. In a simple and limited context, a cause is that which brings about or produces an effect. If you slam a face with sufficient force, blood will rush to the skin and it will redden. The slam would be the cause of the redden skin. If you fall of a ladder and break a bone, falling is the cause of the break. Well, it is one cause. Even in this example, falling is not the sole cause while it may be the primary one. A wobbling ladder may have contributed, someone yelling that distracted the person may be another, or what if the person had a heart attack and then fell. So there could be many causes—multiple causes which include direct causes and contributing factors.

Responsible. To be able to make a response, response-able. This describe one who has the capacity to mentally, emotionally, verbally, or behaviorally make a response. When you hold someone responsible for something, you are essentially saying, “You are the one with the power to do X, to correct it, and/or to change it.”

Blame. This means to find fault, to censure, to condemn, etc. It originated from blasmer to reproach, sometimes is used in the sense of “to hold responsible for a fault.” Whereas cause looks for the factors and variables that influence a result, blame focuses on the inter-personal relationship in which one person reproaches another by finding fault and condemning. Blaming describes a negative way of relating, so no wonder we all have such a strong reaction to being blamed.

Symptoms. A symptom is the result or consequence of a cause. People frequently confuse emotions as the problem, but they are symptoms of thinking, interpreting, valuing, etc.

When you say, ‘X caused Y’ you are holding X responsible for Y. You are implying that X directly caused Y. Ask, “What did X do that directly brought Y about?” Take inflation. For most of 2021 inflation in the US has been at 7 percent.

What is the cause of inflation? Who is to blame? Is influence a symptom?

Granted that inflation results from multiple causes, we do know the primary cause— printing money.

That devalues the currency and makes money less valuable. It invites manufactures, retailers, and everyone then to raise prices. So who set the policy to print more money or push for legislation that resulted in printing more money? Now we go to those in the government who passed multiple bills that created a flood of money into the economy. So I hold President Biden responsible for the current inflation and more specifically his policies.

Did he and the democrats have good intentions? Yes, I’m sure they were doing what they thought best. Yet beyond intentions, we need to go to what and how they thought—their understandings and beliefs about economics and government. In this case, believing in “big government,” and that it’s best to have a central government making decisions, they responded to the pandemic and the downturn in the economy by passing multiple spending bills. They made that response, so they are responsible.

So far there has been no blame or fault-finding. So far, I have only been identifying the persons with the power to respond to the situation. So when does blame come in, if ever? Blame would arise when it becomes obvious that “printing more money” does not work, but that flooding the economy with more money actually results in inflation. Once that becomes clear, then to continue doing what does not work gives place for “finding fault.” That people make mistakes, misunderstand how something like the economy works, etc., that’s human nature. It is continuing to do what is harmful that enables one to take the next step, namely, reproaching the person for making things worse.

I use this example because it has been one of the main conversations politically for some time. We spent more than a whole year throwing money at the economy and now we have the worst inflation in decades. The first step in any confrontation is holding someone responsible for his or her actions. When done respectfully, this is a caring relational skill. The second step is issuing a warning that rebukes in order to help the person get back on track. What makes the rebuke ineffective is typically a closed mind. The person cuts off feedback, refuses to face reality, and is driven by bias and ideology. By the time of a rebuke, things are usually in a pretty bad way and so it often does not work.