COACHING FOR BEING NON-DEFENSIVE

We have all been defensive and most of us have felt defensiveness this week. It’s a pretty common experience. We have accessed the state of feeling threatened, attacked, or insulted so we put up our defenses and closed shop. The person who triggered the sense of threat is then not allowed entrance; they are stopped at the front door, blocked by a locked door and a “Do Not Enter” sign. We all re-experience this state from time to time—especially when we are not feeling well, or just not at our best, or when we sense that change is being imposed upon us, or when we feel no one is listening. In fact, for most of us—a wide range of things can trigger defensiveness in us. And sometimes it is useful. Sometimes. But not always. In fact, most of the time it is not useful.